2015 Movie Round-Up!!

Hi guys!!

So what if it's February and I'm only now writing this post, amirite??

After all, I *just* wrote a post about trying to prioritize writing more while also being less rigid and perfectionistic about getting stuff just right by somewhat arbitrary standards.   So I will try to contain my anxious twitching about it ever-so-technically being the second month of the year as I dive into

THE BEST

POST

EVER*.

* = Of this year**.
** = But still!!

No but really.  As you know, I love this Year In Movies Round-Up time of year.

Let's get to it!

Behold:

The PsychoCinematic Year In Movies

(2015 Edition)

1. In a World... (4)

2. Selma (5)

3. Rebecca (3)

4. The Interview (4)

5. Birdman (5)

6. Into the Wild (2)

7. The Magnificent Seven (4)

8. Nightcrawler (3.5)

9. American Sniper (3)

10. Stardust Memories (3)

11. Whiplash (3)

12. Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief (4)

13. The Avengers: Age of Ultron (3)

14. The Imitation Game (5)

15. The Waiting Room (5)

16. Lost for Life (4)

17. Fed Up (4)

18. Anita Hill: Speaking Truth to Power (4.5)

19. Mad Max: Fury Road (4)

20. Crazy Love (3)

21. Hot Girls Wanted: A Documentary (3)

22. Gideon's Army (5)

23. The Dark Matter of Love (4)

24. 12 (5)

25. Jurassic World (1)

26. Jupiter Ascending (1)

27. Monsters University (3)

28. The Babadook (5)

29. Side Effects (2)

30. Inside Out (3)

31. Trainwreck (4)

32. Planes, Trains, and Automobiles (3)

33. The Omen (3.5)

34. Let the Fire Burn (5)

35. Phoenix (4)

36. A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night (4)

37. Best of Enemies (4.5)

38. Do The Right Thing (5)

39. Rocky (2)

40. Black Mass (3)

41. The Blob (3)

42. The Martian (4)

43. The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2 (4)

44. Defending Your Life (3.5)

45. Citizenfour (4)

46. Tales of the Grim Sleeper (4)

47. White Christmas (3)

48. Short Term 12 (4.5)

49. Citizen X (4)

50. Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (5)

51. Hoop Dreams (5)

52. The Man from U.N.C.L.E. (3)

While in last year's post I noted that there was one particular month that was spectacular in terms of movie viewership (not to mention a few other things), I would like to thank the two very special months of May and December 2015 for making attainment of my 52-movies-per-year goal possible.  

Apparently sometimes all it takes to achieve one's goals is a spring cold that won't die and desperation.

Anyway.  Let's kick things off, as usual, with this year's worst movies.

Happily there were actually relatively few terrible movies seen this year.  Sadly, I think this might be in part because there is some score inflation happening as the years go on.  Extra sadly, this means I only get to make up snarky subheadings for a paltry five films.

For being based on a perfectly compelling true story but nevertheless sucking 

due to bizarrely poor execution:

Into the Wild (2007)

For desecrating a classic, not-very-tacit misogyny, making Bryce Dallas Howard run in stilettos, 

and trying to de-sexify the sexy sexy Chris Pratt:

Jurassic World (2015)

For being insufferably but not interestingly weird, poor pacing, too much Mila Kunis shrieking, 

and trying to de-sexify the sexy sexy Channing Tatum with weird makeup:

Jupiter Ascending (2015)

For Soderbergh seriously you can't just remake "Traffic" (2000) this time vilifying medications that actually help people but (spoiler?) add a hot evil lesbian backstory 

and think we'll all just be cool with it:

Side Effects (2013)

For HOW IS THIS A "CLASSIC" MOVIE WHEN IT IS SO TERRIBLE:

Rocky (1976)

In selecting my least favorite movie from 2015, I'm pulled in a couple of directions.  I'm tempted to choose "Rocky" because WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT SERIOUSLY GUYS.  I'm tempted to choose "Jupiter Rising" because it was so weirdly bad it still kind of makes me feel a little bit nauseated just contemplating it.  I'm tempted to choose "Jurassic World" because I am filled with rageful indignation over its existence.

However, I choose:

Because I get what we're trying to do here and I hate big pharma as much as the next bleeding heart, but it is profoundly irresponsible how this movie portrays psychiatry and psychiatric medication.  Of course there are bad practitioners, medications have side effects, and not everyone with mental illness needs medication to get better, but there are LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS of people whose lives are made actually livable or at least substantially better because of psychiatric medication.  So thanks a lot for furthering that mission, Soderbergh.

Blech.

And now, to greener pastures and happier topics!  I saw SO MANY good movies in 2015!  

In fact, I saw almost three times as many great movies last year as bad movies.  So although I do love writing snarky subheadings, it's also possible I just got a bit better in making my movie-viewing choices this year.

The BEST movies I saw in 2015 were:

Selma (2014)

Birdman (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) (2014)

The Imitation Game (2014)

The Waiting Room (2012)

Gideon's Army (2013)

12 (2007)

The Babadook (2014)

Let the Fire Burn (2013)

Best of Enemies (2015)

Do The Right Thing (1989)

Short Term 12 (2013)

Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)

Hoop Dreams (1994)

There really were so many wonderful movies this year.  As always, I like to take a moment to reflect on some of the particularly special films before I choose my very favorite.

Clearly this year I've been preoccupied with justice and the fight for equal rights in American society.  These areas are well-represented in the movies I sought out and loved this year.  "Gideon's Army", for example, has really stayed with me.  The film documents the lives and work of three Public Defenders in the South.  It's crushing in so many ways, but also instills a deep sense of gratitude for the people who dedicate their lives to preserving some semblance of justice and right to a defense for the accused.  "Selma" was beautiful and heartrending.  "Let the Fire Burn" gave voice to a terrifying moment in remarkably recent American history that many of us have probably forgotten but most not forget.

As I noted in my post about the movie, I truly think "12" is so special as a peak into another culture through the lens of an important American narrative.  And based on my comments just a moment earlier, we know I don't take readily to remakes.  

"Short Term 12", for its slight imperfections, is a film that, in some moments, so closely captured the weird blasé chaos emotional gut punch multi-layered mess of some of the facilities I've worked in that I had to pause it a few times to take a breath.  It was at once so deeply validating and breathtakingly too soon.  I'm still telling myself I'll write a post about "The Babadook," because I am so excited for horror if that's what the genre is going to look and be like--terrifying in its surreality and all-too-real-ity.

"Birdman" is a gorgeous stream-of-consciousness wonder.  Iñárritu is an innovative treasure.  Emma Stone explodes and Edward Norton sparkles.  God that movie!

But of all those films, if there's one I want people to see, especially now, it's:

I'm so lucky, because I saw "Do the Right Thing" in a theater (at one of my favorite museums ever, of course), and I saw it blind.  Meaning: I had no idea what I was in for.  If you somehow haven't had the movie spoiled for you, please just figure out a way to see it before it is.  It is so stunningly beautiful, unfolding like a rich and intricate play, drawing you into a sweet sea of little intimacies and discords before you realize that even gentle oceans can drown you with a quick, vicious, hauntingly prescient riptide.

See it!

{Heart}

Welcome 2016!: Resolutions Edition

WOO!

I hope 2016 has already offered you pleasant new stuff and things!

I'm actually feeling pretty excited to continue our grand tradition of revisiting last year's resolutions before setting new ones for the new year.  So let's talk about resolution-y stuff!

First!  Last year's resolutions!

1. More Buddhist readings.  More!

So my Plan A was to read "The Tibetan Book of the Dead."  I got about this far:

...Yeah it was pretty challenging.  I got stuck in a list of gods of various colors holding various weapons and my will gave out on me.  I can imagine revisiting this book at some future time, but after I got a bit stymied I decided to switch strategies.

Which is why it's good I had this as my Plan B:

I've already read it but it's been a while since I've revisited it.  It's a deceptively short little thing, as each passage feels dense and demanding of thoughtful reflection.  Even so, I've just about finished it by now after reading a paragraph or three each morning for a few months now.  A few weeks ago I got to my very favorite passage, which I find immensely comforting.  Take a listen if you're interested!

2. Reduce mindless and aimless screen time.

I think I've actually been somewhat successful with this resolution, too.  Although I still spend plenty of time distracted by phone/stupid Internet stuff, I've also been able to gobble up many articles and actually substantive things through device time, so it feels much less like a drain of my life force.  

There's definitely some more work to be done here, though, especially when it comes to doubling up on screens (i.e., on phone while watching TV)--that feels as close to actively rotting my brain as possible, so I'd like to actively stop that.

3. Let more objects go and enjoy what we keep.

Bought this:

Read it, sticky-noted it, made Husband read passages from it.  I'm sure it'll be great to use it eventually and I'm actually excited to execute the strategies within.  But Jesus it sounds like it'll take a lot of time, and weekend down time feels like a desperately scarce resource to expend on contacting the potential joy derived from my sweaters.  Maybe next weekend...?

4. Facilitated by our beautiful new food apparatuses, I want to cook more and learn to cook new stuff.

I get home at 8:30/9 pm most work nights.  Better luck next job.

We have gotten better at eating more vegetables, though.

5. More learning on the agenda: Study for and kick the shit out of the licensing exam, and otherwise learn voraciously.

After an exceedingly reasonable and painless* process, 100% resolution success attained.

Otherwise, my repurposing of screen time, continued mentorship by some really amazing supervisors, and periodic self-directed at-times-frenzied manual reading have generated much new learning across a variety of areas.  Which is very satisfying.

* = Lies.

6. Remind myself to love all living things each day.

I love you guys but I'm not trekking out to my car to document this, however: I promise I made myself a little notecard thing that I taped to my dashboard with a quote from the Dalai Lama reminding me to "treat everyone as a friend."  It has not cured my road rage, but I do think it's helped it abate.

...In addition, to be 100% honest, I also... um.... broke my car horn.  Possibly by honking it too much.  Safety issues aside, this has actually provided me with an unexpected opportunity to (be forced to) practice distress tolerance and radical acceptance as people drive like freaking maniacal idiots in my immediate vicinity.  I honestly think it's been good for me, because on average I have felt much less angry now that I can't actively communicate my displeasure to people in the futile hopes of changing their behavior.

I have also gotten really good at flashing my high-beams to compensate.  Because seriously YOU CAN'T MAKE A LEFT TURN AGAINST TRAFFIC IMMEDIATELY AFTER THE LIGHT TURNS GREEN YOU'RE GOING TO GET SOMEBODY KILLED.

7. Watch 52 movies!

Just barely but yes!

Okay!  I was actually generally much more successful in completing last year's resolutions compared to recent years, and that honestly feels pretty nice.

So let's think about resolutions for this year.  I have a few goals:

• Not seven.  Seven is too many and it's just a little stupid to have that many.
• Still kind and achievable for future-me's sake.
• But also still a gentle push to make me do stuff that's important to me.

Okay.  So:

1. Write more.

To reiterate my last post, I am definitely re-committing myself to writing this blog.  It brings me too much joy and serves too important a purpose in extending my identity beyond my career to let this practice fall apart.

The main thing that needs to change to facilitate this is my rigidity about what posts need to look like.  This means that I'm going to let myself write posts that maybe aren't as over-decorated and thorough and "sufficient" by whatever arbitrary quixotic standards I have for myself.

More concretely speaking, that means I'm going to let myself write really short stuff sometimes.  That also maybe means there won't always be pictures.  Or maybe just not multiple pictures, because I find myself avoiding writing posts when I anticipate having to shuffle through google image search results even though it's really not that hard.

I also may need to put a little more faith in my distress tolerance abilities, especially after I've spent the last few months practicing them in my horn-less car.

2. Learn Swedish.

Wild card resolution!

My brother learned Swedish and requested that I learn them so we can gossip in group social situations.  There is clearly literally no good reason not to fully comply with this request.

I will be supported in this endeavor by this delightful (and free!) owl-based language learning app.

3. Read stuff and learn things.

This means reading articles instead of tooling around on social media.  This means reading books instead of watching more TV than I actually want to watch.  This means prioritizing learning stuff because I have a hungry brain and I feel happy when I feed it.

Also this podcast series is awesome for these purposes if you're interested in similar pursuits.

4. Watch 60 movies.

Okay, in kindness to my future self, really the resolution is 52.

But a) I really felt crappy about only watching the bare minimum last year, and b) that fact is illustrative of imbalance between work versus all the other things that must be continually worked on.  If I watched two-extra-months-worth of movies, that would signal things are a little more in balance in my life.  So I'll accept 52, but I'm shooting for 60.

And that's it for today!  I'm hoping I'll get to the 2015 Round-Up tomorrow, so stay tuned!

And again:

{Heart}

Closing 2015: Re-evaluation Edition

Almost New Year's Greetings!

I've been reflecting on the fact that, in spite of anticipating having more time and more brain space to like have a life and an identity outside of work/training and stuff, that has not in practice actually been the case. 

This is evident in many things, not the least of which being that this year signals the smallest number of blog posts I've written in a year since beginning this little blog, and the first year since its inception that I have ever-so-barely hit my 52-movies-per-year goal.  I watched my 52nd movie last weekend after somewhat-frantically realizing that if I didn't aggressively step up my movie-watching game this month, I would fall short; as a result, I watch 9 movies this month.  Obviously in some ways that's great, because that's a lot of movies... but it's also a cue that something is going on here that needs my attention.

My post in July definitely signaled a turning point for me, although where that turning point is leading me I'm still unsure.  In spite of a very strong, rational, personal values and self-care-driven commitment to movies and writing about them, I sat to write that post and just didn't want to.  With regard to this particular writing endeavor, I've been feeling strikingly blah and uninspired to varying extents ever since.

I've entertained the possibility that this is just something I've--what? outgrown? lost interest in?--but that doesn't feel right at all when I really sit with it.  I would certainly have a hard time giving myself permission to opt out of something I've committed myself to, but that's not why I'm rejecting that potential explanation.  It just doesn't sound right to me.  And for that matter, if movies and talking about them in this forum is something I've lost interest in, it's the lack of interest that's a problem rather than the endeavor itself.

I think the more honest and difficult explanation is that I still have not figured out how to find a healthier and more livable balance in my life.  To the contrary, I now get home later than I want to almost every work night and feel frenzied most of the time by all the things I am under-attending to when I'm not at work.  That is in part because I have to find a job after my postdoc ends in a few months, which is of course a demanding exploit that has involved time off work with compensatory over-scheduling of clients on my non-off-work days to avoid disrupting their treatment while I'm away.  It's also because my commute is way too long.  It's also because I don't like saying no to things at work because I like my work.  It's also because I have definitely not yet figured out how to set and adhere to boundaries that empower me to have a life with room to breathe.

Sometimes I despair because it seems like the era of my life in which I can actually have that breathing room will never come.  There are certainly basically no people I can think of who seem to have that room, so the lack of role models is deeply disheartening.  There's always another thing to hustle for, another thing where you tell yourself it'll just be like this for another few days/weeks/months/years and you can make it work.  For godsakes, I don't even have kids yet (should I be lucky enough to have them at all).

Aside: The first person to tell me the era I'm longing for will come when I retire will be pinched.

ANYWAY.  My lack of a sense of inspiration about this project, I believe, is a direct by-product of this imbalance, anxiety, frustration, exhaustion, and losing-battle struggle.  It is therefore a thing I must fight to win back.  Consider this the first of however many resolutions for 2016.

That, of course, and my vow to watch 52 movies.

Enjoy a wonderful evening tonight and a peaceful and happy New Year!

{Heart}

Happy Belated Thanksgiving! 2015 Edition

Hihi,

In the grand and somewhat irregular tradition of this blog, I belatedly extend to you well wishes for an excellent Thanksgiving.  I hope you all enjoyed abundant delicious things and pleasant time with loved ones!

Husband and I are just returning from where-I-grew-up home after an excellent week.  We ate many Thanksgiving- and non-Thanksgiving-themed things, such as:

Do not be deceived by the styrofoam: dangerous amounts of deliciousness contained.

Hurray for holidays and time at home!

Looking back at my other post-Thanksgiving posts, I'm glad to report that this fall-to-winter transition hasn't been as difficult as previous years when I was sick and/or overworked and/or overtired and/or pretty much miserable.  Although the last two months or so have been very busy, that has generally been due to positive things.

Por ejemplo: I took a trip to a beautiful city for an exciting convention, during which I presented a poster based on findings from my dissertation and enjoyed bonus quality time with friends.

Fun times notwithstanding, like many/most people I imagine, I find it hard to fight the FOMO* whenever I have the opportunity to go do stuff, especially when the stuff includes traveling to nice places, seeing people I love, and/or doing things that are exciting.  Those opportunities are very difficult to turn down.  On the other hand, I am hoping things slow down at least a little for the next month or two.  I could use some more at-home time and less rushing around time, knowing that the chance to see wonderful people and things is ever enticing.

On that note: part of what was so pleasant about our recent trip home was that it was, facilitated by soaring airfare prices, longer than we initially intended.  Instead of what has typically been a glorified long weekend, Husband and I were where-I-grew-up home for a little over a week (because flying there and back on Mondays at exceedingly early hours is an excellent strategy for eluding Thanksgiving-induced airfare hikes).  

Being in one place for a while with only a moderate agenda of things to do was pretty glorious, not least of which because it enabled us to balance the need to do stuff and the need to do no stuff.

Somewhere nestled spectacularly in the middle of these two dueling needs was the "task" of watching two of my favorite comedies with my family.  In continuation of my advocacy for the importance of humor, I would love to share them with you, as well!

Comedy #1:

"Drop Dead Gorgeous" (1999)

I've previously made brief allusion to my adoration for this film.  To summarize the reasons this movie is awesome:

• It boasts an excellent lady-dominated cast including a sparkling Kirsten Dunst, hysterical Ellen Barkin and Allison Janney (CJ!!!), an as-yet undiscovered Amy Adams, a sweet and weird Brittany Murphy, and a maniacal Kirstie Alley.  
• Denise Richards is also pretty wonderful.  I like to take bets with myself as to whether her lack of a midwestern accent was an intentional choice to make her character stand out as a snooty posturer, or whether... accents just... aren't a part of her skill set.  Either interpretation is delightful!
• It came early in the growing mockumentary genre and set the bar unfairly high.
• The plot takes multiple unanticipated twists that are equally surprising and hilarious.
• The story focuses on the heroine's drive to fulfill her career goals and therefore is a wonderful predecessor for other (still annoyingly rare) lady-driven comedies that don't reflexively and often unnecessarily include a romantic subplot.
• It is line-for-line one of the most humorously dense movies I've ever seen.  Every word is golden.
• It contains one of my favorite out-of-left-field lines of all time, immediately following this little outburst:

If you haven't already, SEE THIS MOVIE.

Comedy #2:

"Some Like It Hot" (1959)

I've already discussed my deep love for Marilyn Monroe, which I appear to have successfully transmitted to my little sister via this incredible film.  We watched it together when she visited Husband and I a few years ago, and to my delight requested that we re-watch it over our Thanksgiving visit.

I'm sure there are plenty of comedies from this era about which we've all forgotten, so who knows if this one is at all illustrative of the standard of the day.  That being said, I watch movies like "Some Like It Hot" and get mad at the crap we put up with in the comedy department today.  Nevertheless, there are so many reasons a film like this one has endured; it glitters and pops with incredible writing and intoxicating performances by legendary performers.  

Tony Curtis and Jack Lemmon are so much fun to watch as they experience firsthand the perils and indignities of womanhood in prohibition-era America, including negotiating unwanted advances from hands-y men and breaking themselves of the habit of leading whilst dancing.

In lots of little wholly unexpected ways, this is a remarkably progressive and even feminist film in how it forces men into a woman's perspective.

But of course we're ultimately watching Marilyn.  She is absolutely electric in her beauty, sweetness, and vulnerability.  

And her dresses!!  They're jaw-dropping by any era's standard!

Yow!

If you haven't yet, SEE THIS MOVIE TOO.

It's about time for me to start getting ready for bed since I must make the transition back into the post-vacation work routine tomorrow.  I hope you enjoy the movie recommendations if they haven't made your acquaintance already!

{Heart}

* = Fear Of Missing Out, an at times chronic and debilitating condition.

A Halloween Sampler for All Souls: 2015 Edition!

Halloooooooooooooooooo!

It is time for the treasured tradition of reviewing the movies I've seen so far this year and offering up the creepiest selections in celebration of this spooky time of the year! Yay!

To continue with Halloween Sampler protocol, each of this year's frightening films will be rated not only according to my usual 1 - 5 rating scale, but also with the scary/intense rating system of 1 - 5 exclamation points (e.g., ! = not at all scary, !!!!! = so scary!).

Let's dive in, shall we?

"The Omen" (1976)

Rating: 3.5   Scary Rating: !!!

This year's throw-backy entry!  This classic "bad seed" tale has many delightful and unexpected twists and turns, including but not limited to a trip to an Italian cemetery, spooked giraffes, infuriating outdated psychobabble, and awesome dun-dun-DUNNN moments in a photography darkroom.  Drawback: it's possible this movie was a player in the freak-out over Rottweilers whose present-day manifestation is the freak-out over pitbulls.  But the dogs, for all their forboding and ominousness, look beautiful?

"Nightcrawler" (2014)

Rating: 3.5   Scary Rating: !!!!

In an earlier post, I already mentioned how over it I am with the now-quite-tropey character piece centered on a soulless male psychopath.  That being said, "Nightcrawler" makes for a pretty potent creepfest from beginning to end, thereby making it perfect for Halloween.

Jake Gyllenhaal does a deeply disconcerting turn as Louis Bloom, a reptile doing its darndest to impersonate a human.  Not actually, but that's really what he seems like.  He's actually an off-putting screw-up with delusions of grandeur whose aim is to be the best carnage documenter for the local news.  And by "best" I mean "most sociopathic."  It's a charming, breezy romp!  (In case it wasn't clear: sarcasm.)

"The Blob"(1958)

Rating: 4   Scary Rating: !

This year's even throw-backier offering!

Also: STEVEN McQueen??!!!

This film was this year's superb selection for our viewing-whilst-jack-o'-lantern-carving pleasure.  It is a completely absurd delight.  The effects become increasingly desperate as the movie progresses.  The movie appears to periodically forget that it's telling the "chilling" tale of a gelatinous, carnivorous interstellar being possibly bent on world destruction while it instead postures as a dreamy little romance.  THAT THEME SONG.  WHY IS IT SO PERKY?

Perhaps the only truly spooky part of this movie is the oddly prescient final quip that the world will be safe from the eponymous blob "as long as the Arctic stays cold."  And all this time I was thinking the blob was communism, it was actually catastrophic global climate change!

"Let the Fire Burn" (2013)

Rating: 5   Scary Rating: !!!!

This year's documentary offering!

This film tells the harrowing story of the slow-brewing, ultimately disastrous and deadly conflict between MOVE, an increasingly cornered and radicalized African-American led activist group, and Philadelphia police and elected officials in 1985.

Although the film isn't set up to be a horror story, it is nevertheless disturbing, frightening, and chilling just as much as it is also sickening and heartbreaking.  The title of the movie refers to then-mayor Wilson Goode's instructions to firefighters on the scene after police dropped an incendiary bomb on MOVE's occupied headquarters.  The aftermath is not only an indictment of City leaders' overly militarized response to a fringe group, but also its willingness to destroy and never rebuild the otherwise-not-involved surrounding community.

"A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night" (2014)

Rating: 4   Scary Rating: !!!

This year's contemporary offering!

"A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night" is truly a movie after my heart.  It's like "Let the Right One In" (2008) and "Sin City" (2005) had a baby that was raised by "Persepolis" (2007), but with an awesome soundtrack.

And skateboarding.

It's visually stunning, beautifully and hauntingly atmospheric, intoxicating and transfixing.  I've never seen anything truly like it, but I hope to see a hell of a lot more.  Ana Lily Amirpour, I've got an eager eye on you!

Also there's a cat.

Really, what more could I ask for?

I hope you all enjoy an expertly titrated mix of spookiness and fun this Halloween!  Happy Hauntings!!

{Heart}